Post your personal affirmative action horror stories?

In one office I worked we had to hire Bob because of his veteran's preference. When he got the job, he would call in sick stating, "I haven't been getting enough rest lately". He missed a lot of time at work and he was generally not good at his job. He spent time in court which he was excused for, but it was for aulting women he picked up in bars. Somehow he got transferred to a security guard position.